


Fall Away

by DarkMidnightRoses



Series: Fics that might be deleted soon [1]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Alexander Hamilton is George Washington's Biological Son, Alternate Universe - College/University, Burr just wants everyone to be quiet, Charles is a douce, Dad Friend Hercules Mulligan, Depression, Domestic Violence, Eating Disorders, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, Flirty Marquis de Lafayette, He literally calls John his angel in french so that John doesn't understand him, Hurt/Comfort, I Wrote This In School, I don't know how college works take everything I say with a grain of salt., I mainly wrote this to practice that, I've never written a poly relationship, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Laurens centric, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Multi, My ace ass doesn't want to write that, No Smut, Physical Abuse, Poor John, Protective Alexander Hamilton, Protective Hercules Mulligan, Protective Lafayette, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, Sexual Abuse, That one is mainly referenced, This is all fucked, This is really dark, This sounds lovely, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Unhealthy Relationships, hurt john laurens, poor french, there's no smut though
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-04
Updated: 2019-10-05
Packaged: 2019-10-22 01:50:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17653745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkMidnightRoses/pseuds/DarkMidnightRoses
Summary: John didn't know what to do.Not now, not ever.This was all a mistake.Why couldn't everything go back?(Title from Twenty One Pilots, because I love them.)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Not beta read so please point out errors.

John was in a bad situation, bad wasn't even the right word, it was worse than bad. Right now he was pathetically on the ground after Charles had just left. He was still in the relationship, he knew it was bad, but he couldn't leave. He got himself up and went to the bathroom, he needed to fix himself up before he went out. John looked at himself in the mirror, it wasn’t as bad as he thought it was. His arms were still covered in bruises and he couldn’t go anywhere without wearing a long sleeve shirt, but it wasn’t as bad as it felt. There were some cuts from the glass that thrown at him, so he did have to clean that. After he was done cleaning himself, he got dressed, it was fall so he could totally get away with wearing a hoodie. It was Saturday, which meant no school, which was great as John did not feel like school. College was great and all, but he definitely preferred hanging out with friends.

Speaking of that he was just now heading over to hang out with Alex, Lafayette, and Hercules. The group was in a poly relationship, but still didn’t mind having John over which surprised him to no end. As soon as they announced they were dating John felt a wave of emotions. He was happy for them, of course, but he also felt left out, sad and jealous. He tried not the let it show though and made the worst decision of his life. Dating Charles Lee. If only he wasn’t clouded with all his emotions and had just said no when Charles asked him out.

That was not what he trying to think about now though. He continued walking to their dorm room, Alex and Laf were assigned the same dorm while Herc was just over there all the time. John really liked going over, he did, but it did hurt seeing them all happy with their relationship while John was suffering in his. He shook his Head, he wouldn’t want anyone to go through what he was.  
After a short while he arrived at their dorm, he opened the door as they knew he was coming over. He opened the door to see them all cuddling on the couch. It hurt John to see the scene, he could never have that, he could never, not with them, not with Charles, not with anyone. They did eventually notice he was there and invited him to watch TV with them. John became flustered, that’s what he came over here to do, but now… he didn’t know. He really just wanted to get away from his dorm.

“Oh yeah… I, ummm.” John stuttered as he scratched the back of his neck. He slowly made his way over to the couch and sat at the far end. Alex noticed his discomfort and shifted so that he could look him in the face.

“You look uncomfortable Laurens, is something the matter?” Of course Alex noticed it, he was sure Laf and Herc also noticed.

“No, just tired…” John didn’t look Alex in the face, he couldn’t, Alex would know he was lying if he could see his eyes. Hell, he could probably already tell.

“Laurens…” John flinched as Alex put his hand on his shoulder. Something they all obviously noticed as Alex immediately retracted his hand. Laf nudged Alex over and sat next to John who looked uncomfortable at best.

“Petit tortue, we are worried about you, what is wrong.” John smiled a little at the nickname, it meant little turtle, it fit him well. Alex’s was petit lion and Herc’s was mon nounours, it meant my teddy bear, very fitting.

“I’ve just been stressed for a while.” John gave Laf a quick smile before returning his attention back to the TV, he wasn’t actually paying attention.

“That’s not all, petit tortue we know you, all 3 of us has noticed that you’ve been acting weird for a while now. We just want to help you.” Laf slowly put his hand on his shoulder, John held in tears, it was not the time to cry. He held it in for a solid 30 seconds before he started bawling into Laf’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry!” John gripped onto Laf’s shirt like a lifeline. Laf was significantly taller than him. John was only 5’3 and Laf was 5’11 so Laf had no problem wrapping himself around John to give him comfort. Herc and Alex were also hugging him to give him comfort. They were both taller than him, Alex only a little bit at 5’7, but Herc was 6’1. John realized how close the three of them were and quickly pushed them all away. The three looked surprised, the only person still on the couch was Laf. John soon realized what he had done covered his mouth and ran out the door, running into an alleyway to cry.

John didn’t know how long he was in the alley, it was a long time for sure, he couldn’t even look at his phone as he knew the three were trying to get ahold of him. He wished he did though as when he did go back to his dorm Charles was already home.

“Where were you? You belong to me, John. You’re mine to own, understand?” Charles looked down at him with a scowl on his face.

“Yes sir. I was… out with friends.” John gave up with lying a long time ago, it was better to be honest.

“It was that group wasn’t it? You’re not allowed to see them anymore.” John was started and looked up at Charles in fear.

“W-what!? I have them in classes, plus… I need to see them.” John regretted speaking up as it was rewarded with a slap.

“You may see them in classes, but that’s it! You aren’t dating them! You are dating me!” Charles grabbed John by the wrist and dragged John to a wall and threw him against it. John cried out as his back collided with the wall. “Stay down kitty, and take off that hoodie, it covers my handy work.” John did as told, he was wearing a t-shirt under it, it was black which contrasted with his pale blue hoodie. He had on basic black pants and normal black vans. “Good kitty,” Charles said heading into the kitchen to grab something. John hated the nickname so much.  
John sat there until Charles came back with a food bowl filled with, what looked like, leftovers. It was disgusting. “Eat. Can’t have people getting suspicious, though I wouldn’t mind you losing weight. It’s not like you need that extra fat.” John was used to hearing that sentiment, Charles stated it all the time. John wasn't surprised when he heard t anymore, he just accepted it and ate less, if he ate at all. On days like this he normally didn't, it was degrading in a way that John would not accept just yet. Charles left into the bedroom, he wouldn't mind if John threw away the food. John stood up carefully and dumped the food in the garbage can and set the bowl in the sink. There weren't enough dishes for him to have a reason to do them. After a minute John finally broke and checked his messages.

Alex - We're sorry if we did something wrong. Please just talk to us.

Laf - Mon ami we did not intend to hurt you in any way.

Herc - Please just tell us when you're safe.

It was all in the group chat, that was helpful at least. John didn't know whether he should answer or not. Charles hadn't blatantly said anything about texting, but John knew it was implied. He decided to give them a short text that would satisfy them and Charles.

John - It's fine. I'm fine. I just want a little time to myself for a little while. It's not your fault.

John wasn't happy sending off the text, he wanted to tell them everything, not yet though. He knew the time would come eventually, he just had to wait it out. He could last until then.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy.

This fic might be deleted. I have had the intent to redo it for quite a while, but I have never got around to it, and I might never at this point. I wrote this after a pretty dark time, and reading it over gives me goosebumps. I write shit like this a lot, but this one just hits... different? It might be because, in a way, it reminds me of something that happened to me? It's really not, but it kinda hits that way.

I'm going to take some time to see if it's worth saving, it's not like I haven't written stuff like this before, but it might be deleted. I hope you understand. We'll see. Plus, I kinda dug myself into a hole with the plot. I have a bit more on my word doc then on here and it's not really going anywhere. If you wanna take over I'd be more than happy if you "stole" it and continued/redid it. 

Sincerely,

DarkMidnightRoses


End file.
